I had an experience where I decided I was going to be present with my friends, and not be photographed. I choose not to share publicly about the experience, and felt immense peace with that decision.

When I requested to not be tagged or filmed, it was met with… perhaps it was confusion… or what I perceived as resistance.

And I know now that some of that was projection of them stepping into their power to be seen – but for me, that decision was me stepping into my power was having a boundary.

But that really got me thinking — How did THAT become the norm? That I’m weird for not detailing every moment of every day with tens of thousands – or even hundreds of thousands of strangers?

And this wasn’t an easy decision because of course, I want to model what is possible. AND when I’m with a group of high-level people, there’s exposure from one another’s audience. So I knew I’d be missing out on that, as well as having the photos and videos as memories.

But I started to realize that with each post, I was inviting in energy + eyes + opinions + negativity + praise. And I asked myself, are these serving me? Or am I telling myself I SHOULD share because it could help the business? And I decided to protect my peace and my personal process.

I remember watching the social dilemma on netflix and they talked about how are brains are not built to take on this amount of feedback from others.

And especially in the energy of 2020 with so many people operating on social media from a wounded space and low frequency energies of fear, it was a LOT to filter out when even just scroll through Instagram or FB.

When we start scrolling, we often drop into a trance state, which like hypnosis, breaks down the barrier to the subconscious mind and makes us highly suggestable.

And we end up taking on other people’s emotional baggage from reading posts…

My thesis question today is – DO WE UNDERSTAND THE COST/BENEFIT? Like REALLY understand it?

Pre-social media I had my camera everywhere. I was constantly filming, documenting, everything. It was a running joke that I’d always be filming. And that was SO abnormal then. Today, NOT being filmed and photographed, especially in marketer circles is so strange.

But are we being intentional? Are we truly questioning the IMPACT? Do you create intentional space for evenings or experiences with no phones?

While it can be a powerful tool for sales, we have to also begin to challenge the accepted norms. Check in. Does this ACTUALLY feel good? For what purpose am I sharing this?

Who am I hoping will see this? What do I hope they gain from being let in on this part of my life? This thought? This moment?
I was talking to Nicki, who is a part of Team Hey Jen Casey about this, and she shared an experience that PERFECTLY illustrates this – She went to the Museum of Sex and there was a pole that you could go explore. She said she watched as all these women asked their significant others to film them dancing on the pole. And that many of the partners looked less than thrilled.
I am 10000% female embodiment and empowerment and expression to the max – so this isn’t about that.

The takeaway for me from Nicki’s story was one of INTENTION. Really asking yourself, for what purpose am I going to be filmed AND post this for the world to see? Is it one of empowerment? Is it coming from wanting significance? Wanting to be told you’re attractive? Right? It’s not the act — it’s the energetic exchange.

Everything is energy — so what is the energetic exchange we are creating with our content?

I see marketing coaches teaching that you MUST share deeply personal info in order to succeed, unknowingly traumatizing their clients.

And people looping in this question – what should I post today – stuck in the belief that they always HAVE to be on.

And actually seeing alllll of this ineffective and unhealthy use of social media, as a business owner – is what inspired me to create a mini program called Primed to Buy – all about how to create content in a way that actually converts followers into buyers – like what content you want to be sharing to create a clear mental and emotional pathway for your ideal client leading up to putting out a new program —

And I felt called to put this together because I was seeing so many online business owners getting lost in the nonsense, they weren’t actually leveraging their content for their BUSINESS, which, hello, is exactly why they said they were on social media in the first place. Like scrolling isn’t working your business.

Also I knew I wanted a better resource that I could personally use to train my team so that I could be supported in content creation leading up to launches, so that I could actually take breaks from logging in, knowing that they have it handled. If you want to check out the details for Primed to Buy, you can head to primedtobuy.com and for $47 I’ll teach you my whole system. I’ve linked it in the show notes as well.

I felt compelled to create this because I talked to so many people who were in this spiral of “what should I post today?”, especially leading up to a webinar or some other launch mechanism, so they’d be creating on the fly, posting filler content, or sharing nothing at all. And they had no system of way to get their team – social media manager, va, content manager, etc. to support with real strategic content. And the depth of the problem went far beyond the marketing copy we read again and again – – Are you burnt out?? Or having ineffective content that didn’t lead to sales…

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To business owners using social media: There are solutions if you do want to post consistently AND you do not need to turn every single moment of your life into a piece of content. And you don’t need to feel guilty about it. You’re allowed to just live your life in the present.

This doesn’t mean you don’t want to be visible. It may simply mean, you’re clear on your boundaries and desire to keep some things of life that are just for you. … You know, how life was before social media.

It’s healthy to create memories that aren’t exclusively experienced through the lens of a phone — or have laughter, or deep conversations that aren’t being recorded for all to hear.

You’re taking an intimate moment, and inviting in hundreds, thousands, tens of thousands of other eyes, energies, opinions (good/bad). Be intentional.