When we look out over the next 12 months and you think about the things that you want to accomplish, what do you need to do in order to make it happen?
When asked that question, most of us don’t really have a concrete or clear answer. I really want to give you some clarity around this. I want to share what I’ve been using recently in my life and business that are absolutely changing the game for me. I feel that I’ve been given a little advantage to really plow through fear and to see some amazing results in my life and in my business.
I’ve worked with hundreds of coaches over the last year, and I know that so many of you in the early stages will have a lot of different emotions.
It’s that entrepreneurial roller coaster.
We start out with ignorance on fire. There were things that we didn’t know. So, we’re a little bit surprised when things end up being more emotionally taxing and a little more intellectually difficult than we anticipated.
A lot of the time, we’re learning a whole new skill set.
We’re already masters of our craft in our given expertise, but when we come into the business world, we are starting from zero again.
I did that when I was a health coach, so I totally get it. That’s why now, as a business coach, I love working specifically with health and wellness coaches. For this year, I have some massive goals as I know you do, too. I have no question: I’m gonna smash them. I’ve got these three tools in my toolbox.
So how am I getting even more clarity around getting to that next level?
The first thing is, recently, I realized that there were certain things in my life that I thought I’d let slip. I was crushing it in my business. I need no accountability when it comes to my business, but certain other areas of my life – like my health – were slacking a bit. Even though I was a health coach, I wasn’t taking care of my fitness, my back pain, or my hormone issues that I knew I needed to address. So, I just made this commitment to myself that 2018 was going to be the year of vibrant energy and health.
The second thing is fun and playfulness.
When we get into that hustle business mode, we carry a heavy masculine energy of go-go-go.
Sometimes, we forget that we’re doing this because we love it and it’s fun.
So those are my two values that will guide me through the next year and beyond. Those are my priorities.
I made a decision that I was no longer going to negotiate with my mind.
Think about your mind, and the thoughts that flow through your brain every single day. Are they really your thoughts? Where did those come from? Those are things that we’ve heard, that we’ve consumed. They are stories that we’ve created.
Recently, over the last couple of months, I can recognize a B.S. story. I’m making up a story, like, “Oh, I can’t get out of bed because I need extra sleep.”
Well, no, you don’t.
You’re actually now causing yourself to wake up in the middle of a sleep cycle.
Get your butt out of bed and do the friggin thing that you said you were going to do last night.
Keeping my word to myself has been number one.
I’ve made that my mantra to the point where I even started speaking directly to my subconscious. We have our conscious mind and or subconscious.
Example: if I want to wake up at a certain time, before I go to bed I will say to myself:
I now command my subconscious mind to _____.
“I now can command my subconscious mind to wire itself to wake up promptly at nine o’clock. I have an abundance of energy and vitality.”
You can say whatever you want and you can even say, “I command my subconscious mind to now heal the cut finger.” (I did that one the other day – it was quite the gash, but healed in a day!)
You could use that for anything. How can you start to play with this, to prime your mind to work for you and not against you?
You’re not just creating a discipline on the surface level, but actually using psychology-backed systems and tools; things that are proven to work.
I’m also a really huge fan of the 5 Second Rule by Mel Robbins.
Let’s say you have a client who is going to go do a workout and they say, “I’ve lost my motivation.” And they talk themselves out of it. In applying the five second rule, what you do is any time you’re approached with making a decision, count backwards from five. The women that I taught inside my academy were hysterical. They were using it for getting on live video, and ironically enough, it used to countdown five-four-three-two-one. They were using this to get over their fear and just freaking press “Go live.” Once they got on video, they lived through it and they were really happy that they did it.
What’s powerful about the 5 Second Rule is that it’s not just a fun tool to use.
It’s actually going to disrupt the pattern.
Here’s what’s happening for a lot of us.
We get into these patterns that can become a downward spiral. Some days, you might be in the middle of building your business. You’re creating a landing page or doing something that’s new and it’s overwhelming to you. All the sudden, you recognize how hard it is and you feel like you can’t actually do it. So then maybe you are scrolling social media, and you’re looking at all of these other people who are launching new programs. I know a lot of my clients were freaking out that they didn’t have programs out on January 1st. They felt like they were going to miss the wave, and they were depressing themselves by feeling convinced that they were not going to make sales; or, they weren’t going to be able to help people because clients were already scooped up by all these other companies and personal brands.
I was like, “Guys…. There’s always people who need to lose weight. There’s always going to be somebody who’s ready when you’re there showing up. So, why are you telling yourself that story? Get rid of it, because it’s not serving you.”
Whenever we’re getting into telling ourselves negative things, that’s where we need to cut it off and break the pattern. And I love the 5 second countdown because that’s just a simple way to do it. You break the pattern.
And, whenever I’m working with my clients and they start with, “Well, I want to make this much money, but…” I immediately stop them.
No buts. Own it.
Say that you want to make that much money, and don’t get into the old story.
We’ve got to break that pattern. Maybe your go-to phrase is to say, “I’m really stuck.” Make a promise to yourself: do not say the word “stuck.” If you say that you’re stuck, then go and do 25 burpees.
When you start to break those connections, we can create new patterns; ones that actually serve you.
And, if you get in the habit of doing that, it’s so much easier to catch yourself in those moments that aren’t serving you. Once you’ve caught the habit, you can redirect to more empowering stories and actions.
Here’s an interesting story. A psychologist who was working in a psych ward had a patient who was having an absolute fit. She was going crazy and having a temper tantrum. Instead of trying to calm her down, he just decided to mirror her. He started doing all the crazy shit she was doing. He was throwing himself up against the wall, screaming, kicking… and then she stopped. She stepped back and looked at him wondering what he was doing. Because he did something different, he helped to break that pattern.
Set up a strategy for yourself.
Use the 5 second rule, or come up with your own.
Maybe it’s 25 burpees any time you start to notice your energy dropping down.
Maybe it’s getting off of social media when you start to notice that you’re comparing yourself to others.
Maybe it’s setting a timer for yourself so that you’re not spending so much time on social media. Setting boundaries will absolutely help.
And finally, something else that I’m loving right now:
I’m starting to make sure that I have certain things on my plate every single day; things that challenge me in a unique way.
Right now, it’s getting up and getting back into my workout routine.
I used to teach fitness classes multiple times a week. I used to work out like a fiend, because that was my thing. I was the fitness chick. I ended up with some injuries, and then I started doing business coaching, so I didn’t prioritize it anymore. “Since it’s not part of my business anymore, I don’t have to be a walking billboard. I don’t to take care of my health.”
Holy crap. I was so wrong.
Your health is everything.
Without your health, energy, vitality….your business does not grow.
Your business can only grow as far as you do.
It took me about a year and a half to really get back on track, because I needed to go to a chiropractor and a physical therapist. So, at the beginning of 2018, I decided to stop making excuses. My big excuse for why I couldn’t work out was that I was in pain. Which was true, but I said decided that I would no longer let it hold me back. I’m way too young to not be exercising, and not have the ability to move the way that I want to.
Instead of avoiding it and being scared, I decided to learn about my body. I found it really wasn’t that bad as I thought. My bones are fine, and my joints are okay. I have to be careful on certain things, but I was creating this whole story about how I was going to die. I’m completely fine.
Now, I can exercise without pain, and it’s freaking awesome. Sometimes we build these things up in our own heads.
In the book Eat That Frog, the one thing that’s been weighing on your shoulders is the thing that you need to just go and do. But, you keep procrastinating until the very end of the day and then you’re stressing about it all day. Then, when you finally do it, you feel so much better.
Find those things that you absolutely hate doing, and start doing them earlier in the day.
I can look at somebody and all of the stories that they’re telling themselves, and I can tell you where they’re going to be in six months.
Because they’re speaking it into existence.
It’s not random. There’s a pattern to all of our behavior. If you’ve ever read The Compound Effect, you can see based on the habits that somebody is doing how much they’re going to grow. So I can look at how someone is showing up in their business and have a really good picture of how much it’s going to grow in six months. This is based on the things that they’re doing every single day.
How many people are they reaching out to?
How often are they getting on their live videos?
What are they spending on Facebook ads?
It’s not that some people are lucky. This is numbers. You can’t argue with that.
I remember when I was having a really low point back when I was a health coach. I was hustling and showing up every day; working 12 hour days, not leaving my computer.
I just buried myself in learning; courses, YouTube videos, studying online marketing.
I just went through this crazy immersive time in my business where I just threw myself into and I built so much endurance and so much stamina.
I had to push through the fear of really growing my business.
But, because of that, people wonder how I did it. And I’m like, no secret: I just showed up SO BIG for three months.
Same thing for you guys. It’s no different. The point here is that we really want to start to develop endurance and stamina. Sometimes you’ve got to do the really boring shit and the thing that you hate doing.
We’ve all got something that we hate doing, and that’s OK. Maybe it’s something that you can actually outsource.
(Unfortunately, in my case, you can’t outsource working out.)
With discipline, you can command your subconscious mind in breaking the patterns.
We really want to make sure that we’re showing up consistently, and understanding that it’s not just about the short term.
Maybe you don’t want to do the live video today, but remember the long term implications of not showing up in a way that you know is going to grow your business. Because you don’t feel good when you skip those things, and then comes the guilt and the shame.
The other thing I want to talk to you about is the masculine/feminine energy.
The feminine energy is the flow state of creativity and nurturing. The masculine energy is the competitive hustle. Men and women both have feminine and masculine energies. But,there are so many amazing female entrepreneurs that I have the privilege of coaching, and one thing that I’ve really started to see recently is that women are shifting away from really stepping into their feminine energy. Women in network marketing struggle with this in particular, because you’re ranked right next to the people who are also in your company. You hustle alongside your competition constantly.
I want to encourage you and I want to give you permission to rest.
Give yourself permission to take some time off.
Because, honestly, the strategy of entrepreneurship is amazing, but it’s really only about 20% of the game.
The other 80% is mindset and psychology.
Focus on developing that discipline, where you don’t negotiate with your mind and you show up every day. Have clarity on what needs to happen, so you can avoid having squirrel brain every single time you sit down to work.
Give yourself that permission to rest, because I don’t see enough people doing that. It’s not celebrated.
I used to wear it as a badge of honor that I worked my ass off. I was very proud of the work that I’ve put in to build my business to where it is today. But, at the end of the day, if I had taken more time to rest and if I had started outsourcing things earlier, I have no doubt that I would have been a lot happier and more joyful during the process.
What the hell is the point if you’re not enjoying it and having a little bit fun?
Plus, the business could have probably grown even faster if I had just gotten other people on my team earlier.
Also, look into working with a mentor who can guide you through some of this; to offer that objective eye on your business. I seriously, seriously encourage you to begin looking into that. I have a mentor. I’m part of a high level mastermind, and I can already tell you that this year is going to be off the charts. I have that tight knit, safe community where I can really get that additional support in scaling my business to the next level.
I also love working in seasons. Even the last two years, I had a season for building a course, tweaking the course, and working with those clients. I had a season for launching a podcast.
I’ve had all of these different seasons in my business.
Sometimes, certain things have to take a backseat, and that’s okay.
We can’t be everywhere. And, if you’re starting to outsource, I would just make a list of all the things that you do on a daily basis, weekly basis, monthly basis. Truth talk: the only things that you need to do are the things that only you can do. Coaching your clients, getting on live video, recording a podcast.
But, there are also people (like Tony Robbins) who train others to be coaches underneath you. So, if you’re wanting a long-term vision, you can create a team and you can start training other people how to be coaches within your organization. This would create more time freedom for yourself, so that you can continue to create content and build and skill.
Write down only the things that you can do, and really start to develop those things.
Remember: your business can only grow as far as you do.
If you are feeling empowered by this, make sure you’re in our private Facebook group (+ feel free to invite a friend!) at Online Coaches Manifest and Monetize!
